About 'And I Cry'
Softcover ISBN: 0-759651-175 Hardcover ISBN: 0-75965-115-9

Austin had gotten involved in it as soon as he was old enough. His obsession was to help fatherless boys through trying times of growing up in the inter-city. He hoped that he could make a difference and change the dead end paths some of these boys were destined to follow. Austin hated the way he had grown up without a father or a positive male roll model. Although, his mother played a major role in the shaping of young Austin, he always felt something was lacking as if there was a void. She did all that she possibly could to keep the family going and seeing that all of their needs and a great deal of their wants were satisfied. For her it was more or less an obsession. His mother was a gutsy thick-skinned individual as solid as a rock. When life would strike her a mighty blow that sent her reeling backwards, knocking her to ground, and left her gasping for air, she always had the strength to get up and deal with the situation at hand. She would summarize, conclude, and then find resolutions quickly. She was talented that way. She had always faced everything head on.

All Austin could say was he was deeply sorry and wanted to make it better. He was compelled to kiss her and feeling it was the best thing to do, he did it. She fought off an impulse to run. He had taken her by complete surprise. This was the last thing she expected and did not know how to respond it. He looked at her. He could see that he had taken her surprise with his forwardness. He hugged her tightly. He thought that she was so very adorable, like a child. He smiled to himself and gave in to spontaneity, kissing her all over, her face, neck and whispering as he did so that he did not want her to hurt and wished he could make it better and he wanted the twinkle back in her eyes. She was still unresponsive. He kissed her mouth again. This time she answered him with her kiss, warm and wet. They were swept up in a whirlwind, caught in the moment, unleashing the controlled passion that neither wanted revealed and he was inside of her now, gone too far to turn back. She became immediately regretful. It would change things. The magic would dissipate. Sex for her had always been the beginning of the end. He was surprised by his action, he never in the past reacted to a woman this way. He had not intended to ever initiate a sexual relationship with Denaire, yet it happened just like that. It appeared to be beyond their control. He knew she had issues and hope this incident would not cause her turmoil. From now on, he would be sure to keep his distance.

He slowly moved to the window to check out the view. Everything was quiet in the darkness of early morning. He looked around the outer walls, which were red brick with small cement ledges on each floor going around the entire hospital. He gazed straight down and below him about three stories down was a roof with a cooling system situated on it. Perhaps this building below him, which extended beyond the hospital, was where the administration was housed or perhaps it was the lab. Then suddenly it occurred to him, and he smiled. He began looking around the room. He tore the sheets and blanket from the bed. He hobbled to closet and found an extra blanket there. He tied each together as best he could. It was not the work of a Boys Scout, he thought but he was sure it would hold up for the most part. He took his homemade rope to the window and lowered it. It did not reach the roof below but he was willing to chance the jump. He lowered himself out of window. The pain was more than he expected but he continued slowly, very slowly. His eyes were moist from the tears the pain brought about and he was weakening fast. He decided to give up and try to go back up the rope, but the pain was worse, he forgot himself, as pain ripped through him and lost his grip.

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